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in which case, I would interpret that as a not-yes and assume that you are definitely NOT exclusive and assume he is indeed acting accordingly…) If he says yes, I would go on to say: “OK, good, that’s what I thought. we live in a time where everyone can see everything that’s going on online with people.Something in me made me curious and I looked at your Match profile and saw you’d logged on recently after we said we’d be exclusive. I’m not here to ‘catch you’ or worry about what you may or may not be up to…I want to be sure that I am getting my needs met and that I’m not just a “rebound” for him. Dear Karen, One thing I know about widowers, followed by two things I know about men.Widowers are QUICK to rebound, to a point of being unseemly.Give him another month to try harder and if he fails, walk away.He’ll probably let you go and resume his new life on I had a man write me from whose wife had passed 3 weeks earlier – they had a 38 year marriage – and she died from a recently diagnosed cancer!My question is this – does this apply to widowers as well or is it fair to give him a little more time and just get busy with other things so I don’t put pressure on him?He says he has always taken it slow in dating and this is nothing new.

Factor in the dearth of older men – there are literally 3 times more single women over the age of 65 – and, well, a decent looking widower doesn’t stay available for very long. And if he fails, he risks losing the woman he cares about.

Right off the top, you mentioned that you and he have agreed to be exclusive.

It’s reasonable to interpret that as meaning you’ve agreed to not date anyone or sleep with anyone else, but I want to ask: when you agreed to be exclusive, how did this come about?

And I while it did make me feel confused and a bit nervous, I figured it’s always possible it could have been something innocent – maybe you were canceling the service, changing your billing info, etc. if you want something other than an exclusive relationship…

if that’s not what you want with me or in general, 100% in your mind, heart, body and soul… I don’t think it makes you a bad person, I wouldn’t hate you, I wouldn’t be mad at you.

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